Jihad Jane
Posted By Russ Emerson on August 4, 2005 at 12:21 pm
What a prize to show for her life of toil,
A bus that runs on vegetable oil;
To keep it running will prove no strain,
Run a fuel line from her peanut brain.
As once again she shows us all
How wrong we are and how we’ll fall.
She’ll grant no quarter, cut no slack,
Get her picture taken on a camel’s back.
Jihad Jane will show us once again,
She’s smarter than all the President’s men;
I doubt Sun Tzu could tell us more
Than Jihad Jane when it comes to war;
She’ll save the world, bold Barbarella,
More wily and wise than any Army fella.
While she fancies herself truly Machiavellian
A more apt description is piggy Orwellian.
It’s true Jane could write an encyclopedia
On fooling the drooling mainstream media.
Princes of primetime breathlessly follow;
Sputum she spouts they eagerly swallow.
Trumpet her tripe as trustworthy truth,
Pushing her pap down the throats of our youth.
Reporters will climb right on down in that sewer,
Covering every mile of Jane’s veggie-fueled tour.
While wiser minds wait, holding their breath,
Warily wondering just how much death
All her agitprop antics will incite this time,
And whose lives will be forfeit for one fool’s crime.
In most scripts of life, we become wiser with age;
But this airhead actress cannot get to that page.
So she’ll be well remembered, as well she should,
As the dumbest damned broad in Hollywood.
Russ Vaughn
2d Bn, 327th Infantry
101st Airborne Division
Vietnam 65-66
(Via e-mail from the author, with a hat tip to Ollie North for the title.)
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