Daily Report
Posted By Russ Emerson on August 23, 2004 at 7:10 pm
While on the way to the store today I did not get hit by a bus.
I did not win the lottery of any state today.
I was not mugged at an ATM today.
No one burgled my house today.
I did not go to see Alien vs. Predator today.
The Olympic boxing quarterfinals were not held in my living room today.
No one shot at me today.
Because, y’know, if I don’t write down that it didn’t happen, it must have happened. Especially if someone else falsely reports that it did.
Oh, but you can take John Kerry’s word for anything.
Hey, I was really sorry to hear about how that rabid dog bit you in the posterior. Why do bad things always happen to good people?