Ode to the Welfare State

Posted By on January 12, 2012 at 3:57 pm

I received in my mail an item that’s apparently been going around the internet recently, what looks like a photocopy of a bit of doggerel that appears to be on New York Daily News letterhead, dated November 4, 1949.

Like anything that circulates on the internet, it’s worth what you paid for it… but the image (see below) looks legitimate, and the language has the right “feel” for the era in question.

Genuine or not, though, the words are as applicable today as they would have been in 1949. Perhaps more so, given our current national financial straits.

ODE TO THE WELFARE STATE
Mr. Truman’s St. Paul, Minn., pie-for-everybody speech last night reminded us that, at the tail-end of the recent session of Congress, Representative Clarence J. Brown (R-Ohio) jammed into the Congressional Record the following poem, describing the author only as “a prominent Democrat of the State of Georgia”:
DEMOCRATIC DIALOG

Father, must I go to work?
   No, my lucky son.
We’re living now on Easy Street
   On dough from Washington.

We’ve left it up to Uncle Sam,
   So don’t get exercised.
Nobody has to give a damn —
   We’ve all been subsidized.

But if Sam treats us all so well
   And feeds us milk and honey,
Please daddy, tell me what the hell
   He’s going to use for money.

Don’t worry, bub, there’s not a hitch
   In this here noble plan —
He simply soaks the filthy rich
   And helps the common man.

But, father, won’t there come a time
   When they have run out of cash
And we have left them not a dime
   When things will go to smash?

My faith in you is shrinking, son,
   You nosy little brat;
You do too damn much thinking, son,
   To be a Democrat.

The photocopy in question:

A Week’s Worth of Twitter Updates

Posted By on January 9, 2012 at 11:00 am

  • I don't know why I should be so surprised about it, but I really do feel better after 8 hours of sleep, rather than, say, 3. #
  • Heck's Bells #lessambitiousrocksongs #
  • The Visitor-on-a-Tourist-Visa Song #lessambitiousrocksongs #
  • Rock You Like A Tropical Storm #lessambitiousrocksongs #
  • The Wreck of the Edward Fitzgerald Kennedy #lessambitiousrocksongs #
  • One Bourbon #lessambitiousrocksongs #
  • Quatre Bras #lessambitiousrocksongs #historygeek #
  • Not so fast there, Sandman #lessambitiousrocksongs #
  • Johnny B. Meh #lessambitiousrocksongs #
  • American Pop-Tart #lessambitiousrocksongs #
  • BiBill O'Reilley #lessambitiousrocksongs #
  • Balzac Blitz #lessambitiousrocksongs #
  • Hirsute Guys of London #lessambitiousrocksongs #
  • Shine On You Crazy Cubic Zirconium #lessambitiousrocksongs #
  • Mmm Mmm #lessambitiousrocksongs #
  • Twist and Groan in Pain from a Herniated Disk #lessambitiousrocksongs #
  • Mr. Accordion Man #lessambitiousrocksongs #
  • The Odds Are in Favor of Getting Fooled Again #lessambitiousrocksongs #
  • Louis, Louis #lessambitiousrocksongs #
  • Smells Like Teen Sweat Socks #lessambitiousrocksongs #OWS #
  • Nothing Compares 2 U2 #lessambitiousrocksongs #
  • Little Red Chevette #lessambitiousrocksongs #
  • Bad Herbal Remedy #lessambitiousrocksongs #
  • Oye Como What? #lessambitiousrocksongs #
  • Oh Petty Woman #lessambitiousrocksongs #
  • Oh, There's That Thing I've Been Looking For #lessambitiousrocksongs #
  • Kalbi & kimchi…. #paradise #
  • Re-re-reiterate: if the words "colossal" & "douchebag" didn't exist, they'd have to be invented to be used to describe Alan Colmes. #
  • Pay attention, Iowa. / RT @IMAO_ If you think Ron Paul has an actual chance to be president, the kind of lusional you are is the “de” kind. #
  • Woohoo! // RT @agentbedhead: New "Justified" wallpapers are out for Season 3! http://t.co/C9hsSKRo #
  • I need a red laser dot to play with to take my mind off everything. #
  • If any of y'all were in N.Carolina, I'd say come on over, let's drink. #IAcaucus #
  • When is the History Channel going to just admit the truth, and rename itself the Alien/Illuminati/Templar/Trilateral/CIA Conspiracy Channel? #
  • Ron Paul shouldn't play the "chickenhawk" card on Gingrich until he first shows us his own Spanish-American War enlistment papers. #tcot #
  • What are the odds we'll ever again have a POTUS who isn't in love with the sound of his own voice? (Slim, meet None.) #
  • Minus spiders, plus heights. Clowns… *shudder* // RT @CatsPolitics: Bridges, spiders, 4 more years of Obama, clowns #MyFears #
  • OK, legs: if you were to, say, stop spasming for the rest of the night, I'd really be OK with that. Promise. Cross my heart. #
  • New beard/mustache trimmer arrived from Amazon today. Kismet has *no* idea how close he is to getting "DOPE" shaved on his side. #
  • Poor bandwidth on the VPN to the office today. Multitasking difficulty tripled or worse. #firstworldproblems #
  • Oh yeah… maybe I should take my medications sometime today if I want my legs to behave. #
  • Finally figured out how to reprogram the thermostat. How humiliated would I have been if I'd had to call tech support? *T-H-I-S* humiliated. #
  • Ducking a strike contingency assignment (climbing utility poles in OH) is one of the few pluses to being a cripple… but a definite plus. #
  • I feel like I've been in a coma all day. Not sure what's up with that. #
  • New "Walking Dead" episodes coming next month… I don't care what @allahpundit says, it's a good show. #
  • Other gamers keep telling me I should try Skyrim. I'm about to give up all my free time for Mass Effect 3, so let's not go nuts, folks. #ME3 #
  • Quick poll: am I the oldest (49) gamer on the planet? I begin to suspect I may be. #bf3 #me3 #
  • My cable went out just now, 10 minutes before work. No net, no phone. Came back in the proverbial nick of. What terrific timing I have. #
  • Perspective: those who mock how the Santorums dealt with the death of a newborn are the same ones who think drum circles are normal. #
  • "Because the Democrats shouldn't have a lock on the anti-Semite vote." #ronpaulslogans #
  • "Do you see? DO YOU SEE?" #ronpaulslogans #
  • "If you've had too much sanity, Dr. Ron Paul has the cure." #ronpaulslogans #
  • "Because liberty is about more than just smoking dope. Sometimes it's about isolationism & letting Iran have nukes, too." #ronpaulslogans #
  • "The voices in my head say you should vote for me." #ronpaulslogans #
  • "I tied an onion to my belt, which was the style at the time. They didn't have white onions because of the war… and Jews." #ronpaulslogans #
  • "Magnets: how DO they work?" #ronpaulslogans #
  • No, I really am handicapped. Serious. // MT @rachelveronica: You're not handicapped. You're exceptional. #EdwardScissorhands #
  • Am I the only one who still has trouble remembering to say "Czech Republic" instead of "Czechoslovakia"? #
  • Another Monday morning, and again my "weekend" begins with a complete lack of sleep. Maybe I should medicate myself…. #